Friday, November 30, 2012

Learning Where to Eat

Learning How to Eat like Julia Child

Holy Christmas tree,
I love my hand, who I met on pilgrimage
Visiting these places,
And I actually fit in because being a lezzy is
Called the fun theory.

Edible friends are awesome
If they sleep in, gargle garlic, and try everything.
The prostate is clean and happy.
Amazing people affected by poetry say last night
Will just go down, full of win.

Rudolph, needless drivel, and balls
Are mission impossible,
Closing to all my pissed-off requests.
I’m sick of seeing
Toothaches, you, that gallery, coffee cups,
Watching hydrogen peroxide genocide.

My mixed threads, bogged down by Scotland,
Don’t put up with fiercely hammering your
Bacon on my cheek. Some might say
Home is learning where to eat.

* Note: This poem was constructed by rearranging the words in Facebook status posts. The picture was the first image that appeared in a search for "Learning Where to Eat."

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Give Me Some Good Stress

It is Hell Week at the Rhode Center for the Arts, where I am playing Clarice in Rudolph the Pissed Off Reindeer. I teach all day, attempt to nap in the late afternoon, and have rehearsals in the evening. Last night, I didn't make it to sleep until after midnight. But I am excited about what I am doing, and I am contributing to things I care about. What I am experiencing is good stress.

Is there such a thing?

Actually, yes. Unlike the stress you hear about most often, good stress (more specifically: eustress), is relatively healthy. It gives you a sense of fulfillment and positivity. You are pushing toward a goal or potentially beneficial outcome. You experience the same physical reaction to eustress as you do to bad stress (distress), but the result is much more enjoyable.

According to Cognopedia, the term eustress was coined by endocrinologist Hans Seyle in 1975. He published a model that divided stress into two major categories: distress and eustress. While distress can cause anxiety, withdrawal, or depression, eustress involves an increase in mental or physical functioning.

Other than my crazy-busy schedule of teaching and acting, there are a few eustress-inducing activities I don't (or wouldn't) mind:
  • Coming in first place
  • Getting a promotion at work
  • Sexual intercourse 
I'll take eustress over distress any day!

Monday, November 12, 2012

Feed the Kitty - origins of the "kitty" tip jar

For my birthday, my wonderful boyfriend bought me a kitty coin bank. The small plastic box has a mechanical kitten inside. When you put a coin on the kitten's "plate" and press the button down, the box opens and the kitten reaches out one paw to grab the coin. The kitten meows once while coming out, and once while going back into the box. It makes me giggle every time I use it and is a pretty good way to save spare change.

Which led me to wonder, why is it that tip jars are called "the kitty"? The word "kitty" was originally used in the context of the pool of money used in a card game, such as poker. With it's earliest usage dating back to 1887, the term developed from the word "kit," meaning a "collection of necessary supplies."

According to, there is also another phrase related to tipping: "the kitty is getting fatter." The concept behind this is that people have "fed" the "kitty," the amount of money is growing in the tip jar, and it is getting "fatter." 

As the website states: "First heard on 'Frat Party At The Pancake Festival' DVD, Phoenix (of Linkin Park fame) held up a tip jar and said, 'It's getting fatter, the kitty is getting fatter!', referring to the exponential increase of spare change as time went on."

Related Links
Yahoo! Answers 
Urban Dictionary

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

The Day After the Election

A fabulous man had super powers,
Meat candy, and wine.
I always knew Obama trusted
Drinking, fucking, and breathing.

Mr. President, a few people
Watch the results, trust news organizations,
Love Facebook.
You are just another word for bacon.

So happy the best projections say
A woman and a lesbian, Tammy Baldwin,
Is probably coming or going down right now
With such integrity.

What I'm seeing is like a fart
Accidentally using feedback,
Sighing relief today.

Election's over.
The people polling in Wisconsin
Post anything political on Facebook,
Vote for the rarest large mammal in the world.

The pimp is president, calling me: hey, hey!
I usually don't get sleepy, but right now
I must not be doing projections.
Obama, walk out, give your speech,
Drop the mic!